1) God Takes a Holiday:
God is tired, worn out. So he speaks to St. Peter, "You know, I need a vacation. Got any suggestions where I should go?"
-St. Peter, thinking, nods his head, then says, "How about Jupiter? It's nice and warm there this time of the year."
-God shakes His head before saying, "No. Too much gravity. You know how that hurts my back."
-"Hmmm," St. Peter reflects. "Well, how about Mercury?"
-"No way!" God mutters, "It's way too hot for me there!"
-"I've got it," St. Peter says, his face lighting up. "How about going Down to Earth for your vacation?"
-Chuckling, God remarks, "Are you kidding? Two thousand years ago I went there, had an affair with some nice Jewish girl, and they're STILL talking about it!"     

2) A logical enough question:
On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: "The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time."
-He continued, "Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you a fine of $180. Are there any questions?"
-At this point, a male student in the crowd inquired: "How much for a season pass?"

1. Viweing the Painting

A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British."
-"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French."
-"No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are Russian."

2. In the Philosophy Final:

A student taking a philosophy class had a single question on his final: "What is courage?"
- The student wrote: "This", signed it, and turned it in. 

KK

." Hogen, a Chinese Zen teacher, lived alone in a small temple in the country. One day four traveling monks appeared and asked if they might make a fire in his yard to warm themselves.

While they were building the fire, Hogen heard them arguing about subjectivity and objectivity. He joined them and said: "There is a big stone. Do you consider it to be inside or outside your mind?"

One of the monks replied: "From the Buddhist viewpoint everything is an objectification of mind, so I would say that the stone is inside my mind."

"Your head must feel very heavy," observed Hogen, "if you are carrying around a stone like that in your mind."

KK